A day in the life...
by submissive_angel
Entries 96
Page 1 of 4
Ice, ice, baby
I have a horrible habit of chewing ice. If ever there were no more ice in the world I think I would have a mental breakdown. I love chewing ice that much! I drive friends and family nuts with it ...
Look ahead, not back
My last two entries were about “my story,” wherein I talked ad nauseum about all the horrible things that had happened to me in my life. Poor, poor me. You know what? Screw that! Absolutely nothi...
My Story - Part 2
So where did I leave off? That’s right....I was living in Illinois in a tiny apartment, working and taking care of my son. So I lasted in Illinois for almost a year. Yes, my mom and stepdad were ...
My story - Part 1
I’m fighting tears and anxiety just thinking about writing this, but my therapist suggested it would be good to get it all out so here we go! I was born in southern Indiana in the same town my pa...
I need to get away
There’s so much going through my head; so many thoughts, so many emotions. Right now the two emotions I’m feeling the most are sadness and anger. I’ve been crying every day for the past several w...
When do you walk away?
I’ve mentioned this in previous entries, but I struggle with mental illness. My diagnoses include affective disorder, anxiety disorder, personality disorder with cluster B traits, and obsessive c...
Brock Turner
Let’s talk about Brock Turner. You know who he is…the college kid who was caught sexually assaulting an unconscious young woman behind a dumpster at Stanford University. The poor young man whose ...
Where should I begin?
It has been months since I’ve written anything…and SO much has happened! When I last wrote I had just gotten out of the psychiatric hospital (my third visit). I had checked myself in that time be...
I need a coffeemaker
I really do. A while back I sold my Keurig because we needed the money. Pitiful, I know, but necessary. Now every night before I go to bed I fantasize about getting up in the morning and having a...
I went to the hospital and came home sick
Yep, it’s true. But it was a psychiatric hospital I went to. I found myself heading down a dark path again and starting to have suicidal thoughts again. But this time, instead of waiting until th...
Walking in a winter wonderland
Or should I say slipping and sliding in a winter wonderland? It snowed here yesterday and now it’s snowing again and it’s icy and cold cold cold!!! This is supposed to last all night and all day ...
A survey....just for fun
What size is the last bed you kissed on? Queen. When was the last time you were sick? July. Are you one of those people who are always cold? Nope. What are you listening to? The TV (Criminal Mind...
I'm not sure what to do
Anyone who knows me knows I suffer from sometimes debilitating depression and anxiety as well as PTSD. I also have some physical complications due to my diabetes. I applied for social security di...
Friends
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about my friends lately, about friendship in general. Don’t you agree that life is more tolerable with good friends in it? I don’t have a lot of friends, but I g...
I wonder if she knew
I had a therapy session yesterday. I have them twice a week, every Tuesday and Thursday. On Tuesdays we start the session using the EMDR therapy and from there I start talking about my brother’s ...
Ramblings
Hmmm....where to start. Okay, the epic yard sale, which wasn’t so epic. On Friday we hardly got any lookers, which sucked. And on Saturday it started raining at 11 a.m., which really sucked. If ...
Selfish
I’ve been told I’ve become a very selfish person....that’s it’s all about me now. I don’t know, maybe it’s true. It started because I didn’t send my dad a birthday card (his birthday was October ...
Not what I was expecting
At the boob doctor, that is. They did another mammogram of lefty. After the doctor viewed the films he told them to do an ultrasound. After he viewed those films he came in the room and had a cha...
Rich in every way that matters
I’m typing this entry from my phone so it probably won’t be a long one. I took my laptop to the pawn shop today. My goal is to get it back eventually but right now things are uber tight for us. ...
Monday, Monday
It was a pretty good day. I had a therapy session this morning and it went pretty good. We didn’t do the EMDR this time, which I was kinda bummed about. I really like that. We did touch lightly o...
Peaceful, nurturer, and protector
I had another therapy session today, and today my therapist did EMDR with me. It’s pretty cool. Before we did the EMDR he had me describe a peaceful place to him, tell me who a nurturing person i...
Blondie and Renry
Otherwise known as Ben and Henry, the two little boys I babysit. Ben is Blondie because, well, he has very blonde hair. Henry is Renry because that’s how Ben says his name and I think it’s adorab...
Her Life
Her Life is a group that meets every Thursday evening at church that’s just for us gals (hence the name). I love it! I always leave feeling 100 times better than when I got there. It’s awesome to...
Liar, liar...
…pants on fire! If this were true, my ass would be ash. I told my upstairs neighbors, who I sometimes babysit for, and the other girl I babysit for that the reason I ended up in the hospital was ...
10 days later
I got home from the hospital today. The psychiatric hospital. I’m sorry to say I didn’t handle the situation well…at all. After my last post here I texted a few people asking if they could talk b...
Book Description
WARNING: If you choose to read this “book” you will be subject to anything that’s on my mind.....anything from bipolar disorder to diarrhea to marital issues. So read at your own risk…and don’t say you weren’t warned!