littlefallsmets ⋅ 45 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,128
Page 5 of 206
june 27 in idea barrages
maybe Yoda wasn’t from a distinct species at all. maybe a halfling and a goblin loved each other very very much and… If bread is called “the staff of life”, is pizza called the ciiiiiiiiiiiii...
june 25 in idea barrages
Mario and Luigi’s mother was named Mia, that’s why they go around yelling “Mama Mia!” al the time. Seriously, bill collectors and telemarketers both, if you call me and I answer the phone and...
june 23 in idea barrages
I enjoy the weird confluence of how now all genre media is about terrible timelines and then we all go on social media and post about them on our own terrible timelines. Cinnamon Twists: the ...
june 21 in idea barrages
Those who can, do. Those who can’t, teach. Those who can’t teach become entertainment executives. Has there been a jukebox-musical made out of Springsteen’s work called THE BRUCCICAL yet? A...
june 19 in idea barrages
An Eric Clapton parody explaining the hierarchy of angels in Catholic mythology called “Tiers In Heaven”. The head canon that the warriors of Eternia aren’t wearing pants at all, they are jus...
june 17 in idea barrages
If they wanna dip into Greco-Roman myth, Count Chocula and Frankenberry could always add a new monster cereal friend The Mintotaur. Game company: “we accidentally made the game too horny, we’...
new boss same as the old boss in poetry
Jesus Christ paid the price for telling people to be nice He was killed off by powerful men His current fans would all call friend would all call boss would all call “God” I’m sure old Chri...
june 15 in idea barrages
When you consider that the Proud Boys are basically just Early To Mid Twentieth Century German Historical Reenactors, it is pretty funny that none of them would know what schadenfreude is, let ...
prompt: fine, title: it's been a long long time in misc. flash fiction
The worst part about being functionally-immortal is watching people you loved age to death and places you cherished crumble to dust, sure. That sort of trauma never erases your humanity, soul or ...
june 13 in idea barrages
You would die if you tried to subsist solely on artificial sugars, all things being Equal. A parody of Stone Temple Pilot’s “Meatplow” about Ronald MacDonald, the Meatclown. A fusion of eve...
two cups of coffee in poetry
I’ve run outta vitamins and I’ve run outta weed and all the rest of the pills that some doctors prescribed can’t gimmie half of what I actually need two cups of coffee and a fistfu...
june 11 in idea barrages
Things that work in a stylized anime setting sometimes look too bizarre/surreal when using real humans in live-action adaptations. The energy of ONE PIECE just looks unsettling w/ real faces ac...
june 9 in idea barrages
No one has ever paid money to see a heckler, a referee, an owner or an entertainment executive. At least no one sane. I guess there’s weird cultists. But in general. Are there people who are ...
june 7 in idea barrages
Why say “country doctor” when you can say “farmacist”? My brain keeps on mashing up that “Tell Me More, Tell Me More” song from GREASE with “Achy Breaky Heart” as if my mind is trying to puni...
prompt: lock, title: lock stock and barrel in misc. flash fiction
The mythological creature as tourism hook is hardly new, of course. Shysters have been selling crude plesiosaur carvings at Loch Ness in Scotland since the 500s, before the word “plesiosaur” was ...
june 5 in idea barrages
For those of your obsessed with age limits in American politics, as if that’s someone one of the more pressing problems, just be careful what you wish for, that absolute record-setting moron Vi...
june 3 in idea barrages
To this day, I still read “Cardi B” as “Car dib” when I first see it. Part of the difficulty of being a man in his early forties is that you’re shopping and there’s a 30 year old woman and he...
june 1 in idea barrages
In the right font, “Shrek” looks like “Sarek” and so if you’re looking to create a new nerdy mash-up meme, you could do a lot worse than fusing Shrek with Spock’s dad. Communion wafers are a ...
“Aged cheese, I can mostly handle,” Frank said, picking at a veggie omelet with a fork his hand made look comically under-sized, “anything with a lot of unconverted lactose, however?” Frank opene...
may 30 in idea barrages
A special detergent for washing blankets called “Oil of Duvet”. A medieval paladin Superman whose arch-nemesis is a bard named Lex Luthier. If only we could get the world to stop mistaking ...
may 28 in idea barrages
I’ve accepted I’ll never be able to play a game that requires more unique inputs than a Sega Genesis paddle provides. I had terrible hand-to-eye coordination even before I was old, now I’m also...
may 26 in idea barrages
I’m here to do two things, have sex and change the world, and I’m possessed of a frustratingly long refractory period. A comedy act called “Yakov Smirnov’s Grandson Jacob Smith” and you say t...
may 24 in idea barrages
Frankenstein performed the first team-building exercise and we all saw how that all turned out. I like to think that Liam Neeson does all these all these awful low-budget geezer-teaser direct...
annual perennial in poetry
(poetry contest entry for Dolgeville’s silver-anniversary of its violet festival) silver bells chime out the summer-time blooming across the ruddy-dusky skies as if Christmas bulbs strung up on h...
prompt: forever, title: her best to understand in misc. flash fiction
The sailor indeed said “Brandy, you’re a fine girl, what a good wife you would be… but my life, my love and my lady is the sea”. That much is entirely accurate, but you gotta understand, that’s a...
