littlefallsmets ⋅ 44
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 4,994
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janu22 in idea barrages
I don’t know what it’d look like exactly, but the first person to come up with a viable pitch to Food Network that uses the title FOOD COURT is probably in for a decent paycheck. Now, if Degr...
jan20 in idea barrages
If DAVE AND BUSTERS turned out to be founded by Dave Matthews and Buster Poindexter, would you be more or less likely to go to their Grown-Up Chuck E Cheese Without The Cool Robots? Just decl...
jan18 in idea barrages
A parody of Modest Mouse’s “Coyotes” about Bronson Pinchot. 83% of fan-fiction can be summed up in five words: “oh no! only one bed!” A Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy porn parody called M...
It was a helluva thing, of course, for Frank to wake from his coma and find his entire species had disappeared off the face of the Earth. The loneliness and existential dread of discovering himse...
janu16 in idea barrages
I finally had an even better idea for a parody of Steely Dan’s “Kid Charlemagne” than making it about Kid Icarus. GET ALONG, GET ALONG TIM CHALAMET, GET ALONG TIM CHALAMET. One of the lit...
janu14 in idea barrages
In Hill Valley California, the Mandela Effect is known as “The Twin Pines Effect”, on account of people who inexplicably remember The Lone Pine Mall being called The Twin Pines Mall. The cher...
janu12 in idea barrages
Frankenberry was the cereal. Dr. Frankenberry was the true monster. “Golf! Brought to you by the people who funded the 9/11 terrorist attacks!” is one of those things I never would’ve predict...
prompt: frank, title: double meanings in "the next big thing" flash fiction
“If you’re the last of your kind,” I asked tentatively, gently as I could, “and it’s been that way for ages?” “Both of which I’m,” Frank interposed, “reasonably certain.” “So why do so many rando...
jan10 in idea barrages
A landscaping fetish involves a lot of weed-whacking and a whole lot of edging. I hope the person who does the medical tests for high-end brothels is called a “notary pubic”. The fact that ...
jan8 in idea barrages
Shredder was pretty good with short-term battlefield tactics, but when it came to the long-view planning, Krang was the brains of the operation. A motorcycle that runs on beer called a Barley...
jan6 in idea barrages
Yosemite Sam didn’t want to do the appearance and signing at the furry convention his agent offered him but he knew he really needed the money. “Great,” he muttered sarcastically as he signed t...
the fault in our scars in poetry
If you want to know why you’re always hit on the most and the weirdest and the worst outside of the local gas stations it’s because the gas stations profit from being ...
janu4 in idea barrages
If it were easy, everyone would already have it done. Tesla Motors is the Disney Galactic Starcruiser of cars. Constantly pretend to confuse Thomas Pynchon with Bronson Pinchot, “Balki” fro...
prompt: cut, title: physician, consult thyself in misc. flash fiction
Power, most acutely power over others, seems to be our universal human allergen. We all react so badly to power. With concentrated enough dosage, we begin to lose some of the most useful tools th...
janu2 in idea barrages
We didn’t call microwaves “Defrigerators” and I think that’s on the all of us. That’s an unforced error. We just weren’t thinking at the time. I hope the first legal marijuana shop in Maine i...
new year bonus barrage in idea barrages
Call all the extradimensional aid you want, that dragon’s still gonna make you into summoner sausage. Ant-Man and The Atom in a winner-take-all diminution derby. I think I’ll call my used m...
dc30 in idea barrages
Red licorice is supposed to be strawberry. The most delicious fake strawberry Dow Chemicals’ wildest dreams could conceive. Cherry? Really? We didn’t crawl outta the muck into the trees and bac...
dc28 in idea barrages
When the moon parachutes / right on up your own snoot / ParAmore Sometimes to be a good person, you gotta be bad at being a person. Shut off the “achieve, acquire, dominate” drive from our an...
prompt: case, title: all acquaintence be forgot in misc. flash fiction
You may have noticed a growing emphasis inside what’s left of our shared culture on alternative Earths, parallel dimensions, multiverses. Roads not taken, what-ifs, mulligans for all regrets. You...
dc26 in idea barrages
When a Canadian gets frustrated, they will often say “well, that just bags my milk”. Has there been a stoner comedy about a feudal uprising called “SERFS UP” yet or is this world just perpetu...
if it weren’t for all my sacrilege I would have no rilege at all and if I had me a good slingshot there’d be one less Policeman’s Ball because I may be kind of tall but I cheer a Golia...
dc24 in idea barrages
Facebook puts really good looking people who you do not actually know into your “People You May Know” feed just to torment you. It doesn’t make you use Facebook more, though, it makes you want ...
dc22 in idea barrages
Head-canon that they’re not called “Pokemon” because they’re “pocket monsters” but because they mutated from eating poke bowls filled with mutagens from Monstano. Where the sperm starts, wher...
prompt: rib, title: he's doing the best he can in misc. flash fiction
We’d been waiting on it for weeks: my uncle’s yearly request for a Christmas tree. He’s a virtual shut-in due to mental illnesses, has lived on the third floor of my grandparents’ house nearly-fi...
dc20 in idea barrages
Why has there never been a crossover between the video games COMMAND & CONQUER and CONKER’S BAD FUR DAY? It seems like a gimmie, you guys. There should be more wedding receptions where pe...