jan 2 in idea barrages

Is a gluten free girlfriend a GF GF?

If you consider that mayo is half eggs, when you’re making chicken salad, the mother and child reunion is truly only an emulsion away.

We’ve managed to make the release of a Star Wars movie into a colonoscopy, an uncomfortable begrudging obligation, something nobody wants to actually do but, hey, you’re kind of afraid you’ll miss something important. Such is the nostalgia-industrial complex.

Nobody puts Baby Yoda in the corner.

It’s a shame the book/horror mash up trend never got around to the middle aged ladies who demand to speak to the manager fighting vampires in EAT SLAY LOVE.

Before he or I die, I’d like to hear Tom Waits cover the theme to “Car 54, Where Are You” as, like, a languid melancholy bar ballad.

Why does T-Mobile think that showing me their CEO do a cooking show as an ad will make me wanna buy their phones? I mean, I make some stupid decisions, yes, but almost entirely about women, not phone ads.

The balancing act of life is to follow your passions without chasing impossible ideals that recede as you chase them, just like the horizon. To be your best self without constantly obsessing over the brass rings outside your reach, still being happy.