july 8 in idea barrages

  • July 7, 2019, 2:04 p.m.
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1.) (They don’t care that he’s so stupid he’d claim there were airplanes in the 1700s if that’s what the teleprompter says. He legitimizes their horrifying racism, that’s all they want out of him. Nothing else he does matters as long as they have that.)

2.) I’m waiting for Amazon to go full super-villain and demand Alaska be renamed “Alexa”.

3.) Ray Romano’s NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD. Exactly the same movie except all the zombies are zombie Ray Romano.

4.) Is it weird I suspect Pat & Vanna detest each other so much either would give up all the fortune and fame to not have to look at the other again for the rest of their life? But neither will quit because they know it so torments the other?

5.) Here’s my pitch: “sprung rolls”. They’re like spring rolls but alcoholic.

6.) But, no, my DUMBEST idea for a parody would be a version of “London Calling” about Star Wars Episode One called “Gungans Calling”.

7.) Though my SECOND dumbest parody would be kind of a hip-hop thing about how terrible the comic strip CATHY was called “Things That Make You Go Ack”.

8.) I like to think that when THE MASK said “Somebody STOP me!” it was actually his inner human trying to sneak a desperate cry for help, trying to escape his possession by a chaos demon, filtered into smug sarcasm by his green tormentor.


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