july 6 in idea barrages

1.) I wonder how long it takes for internet culture to ingrain into our psychoses and the new delusions will instead erroneously believe that they are NOT being watched all the time.

2.) I’m still mad that the Star Wars Holiday Special didn’t involve a love song called “Makin’ Wookies”.

3.) I wonder if after this Dark Age we teeter upon the cusp of, they’ll misremember superheroes as gods we worshiped at temples called Cinema instead of fun stories to pass the time. I wonder if we misunderstand the Greek or the Romans the same.

4.) Maybe the real friends were the Curly’s gold we found along the way.

5.) If I ever date a really short woman again, our couple’s costume of Fat Luke and Sexy Yoda In The Backpack will win all the contests.

6.) Another great fake curse would be “SWEET VIDALIA ONIONS!”

7.) Don’t shame Melania for being a semi-nude model. Shame her for marrying a fascist.

8.) Why do they call Christian church work a “mission” when they could so easily call it “Emmanuel Labour”? I think too many faiths ignore the holy work that is the pun.