apr20 in idea barrages

1.) The hungry mermaids waited for more with baited breath.

2.) The story of the emergency replacement Santa “Christmas Steve”.

3.) Somehow I got to 39 before realizing that the comic actor named “Henry Gibson”, that was just his stage name as a play on “Henrik Ibsen”. To give myself credit, “Henry Gibson” sounds like a fully plausible name.

4.) I mean, yeah, I at least have the decency to only sing “Me and Coolio down by the school yard” in my head instead of out loud.

5.) Foley’s Maxim: the more the trailer for an animated film leans on live-action of famous people doing their voices for the movie, the better the chance that the film is unwatchable drek.

6.) Irony was once fine as a sparingly-used spice, aperitif, palate cleanser, parsley at the side of culture’s steak, a little bright colour, cutting through cloying richness. Now the plate’s full of parsley with one thin fajita strip of meaning & it’s terrible.

7.) I mean, yes, I was singing along to “No Diggity” as “I like what the barn fits, nativity, nativity” but in my defense, I wasn’t singing it out loud, I’m not an actual monster.

8.) Here we are, half-sane in a world full of normals led by complete psychopaths so crazy they can feign normalcy for the rubes. Where do we lukewarm loons fit in? In the land of the blind, half-sight’s mocked as worthless, if they can’t perceive it, how could it matter at all?

9.) If you had to start the project of developing the world’s grossest non-exotic food, “pickled raisins” would be a hell of a beginning point.

10.) They should’ve called footnotes “explanation points” but, again, the world suffers for not consulting me first.

11.) Gotta Worship All! PANTHEON!

12.) This fat little dog frolics gamely, despite his game back knees, ferociously pissing on things, romping with a limp, barking at everything that isn’t a person. It’s his blessing to be unaware of his weaknesses except the moments they manifest. We humans are not so lucky.