mar25 in idea barrages

1.) Raisins are just grapes that gave up on trying to be delicious.

2.) Go to a bar in a nice suit and a gimp mask. Order a martini and when someone finally talks to you, introduce yourself as “Bondage. James Bondage.”

3.) Gladwell’s 10,000 hours are rubbish, mainly as there’s no such thing as universal proficiency, let alone mastery or perfection. You just keep practicing your craft & no matter how good you are, there’s always something new to adapt to.

4.) If you catch someone making a Mr. Freeze pun, acknowledge it with the line “Icy what you did there.”

5.) Most of my dreams that aren’t psychedelic nightmares are just continuations of old jobs I’ve had, as if they’d never ended, part of me remembering… no, I don’t do that anymore… but my autonomic system taking over anyway.

6.) “No one can kill Superman but me!” “Weird flex, Luthor, but okay.”

7.) The first time I heard the song “Brandy” I thought the line was “she gave them whiskey and whined” and… maybe my mishearing was more emotionally correct.

8.) A parody of “Kiss Me Deadly” from the perspective of Dudley Do-Right’s love interest Nell would be culturally incomprehensible now, yes, but mainly I have no chance of signing like Lita Ford so there we are.

9.) The dog’s entire life is about trying to eat what the cat eats but the cat makes it his mission to sleep wherever the dog sleeps, he’s taken to sleeping in the dog stroller, I’m so proud of that cat.