mar10 in idea barrages

1.) It’s National Day Day the day we all come together as a nation to celebrate our tradition of declaring days to mean things.

2.) If you vape while riding an e-scooter, God will drop a fedora straight onto your head.

3.) The key to selling your scam financial instrument to hipster ironists of my generation is to simply call it “Sonic The Hedgefund” and watch the money roll in.

4.) Yes, but the way to a man’s stomach is through the small intestine so really, the way to man’s heart starts there.

5.) The problem with starting a cover band at the retirement village is that you can’t teach an old dog Cheap Trick.

6.) Name your line of knockoff butterscotches “Werner’s Unoriginals”.

7.) Getting stoned at a home improvement store is weird but sometimes you gotta take the highs with the Lowes.

8.) When the longer days warm you up enough to no longer need so much body hair, that’s Daylights Shaving Time.