de17 in idea barrages

1.) Why name your Canadian comic book character something boring like “Captain Canuck” when you could call him “Bro Canada”?

2.) The weirdest thing about youtube is, if you’ve been a fan of a channel for more than a couple of years, you realize that you’ve watched these guys go bald in real time.

3.) The internet continues to flip flop wildly on whether it’s the edgier position to love or hate “The Last Jedi” and to that I say, internet, don’t ever change. By which I mean, internet, please change.

4.) If you really want an economic stimulus package, if you REALLY want millenials to spend money like previous generations did? Cancel all educational and medical debt and protect yourself from the windstorm of everything flying off the shelves.

5.) Theory: Eminem is low-key to rap what Weezer was to pop-rock. Two albums or so worth of great stuff each and then no idea how to come up with new material once they were detached from reality by becoming rich as balls.

6.) ELVES ARE JUST LEPRECHAUNS THAT HAD THEIR MAGIC TAKEN AWAY SO SANTA COULD ENSLAVE THEM.

7.) There is no point in finishing this Duran Duran parody about Theo from The Cosby Show but, damn, the hook is quality.

8.) I finally noticed that Led Zepplin’s “Travelling Riverside Blues” and “Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked” would mash-up almost perfectly.

9.) A fun ending to a Batman story would be all of his rogues cornering him, about to kill him but granting him last words, looking straight at Dr. Crane, saying “I’ll miss you most of all, Scarecrow” and the Joker finds it so funny, he saves his life out of respect.

10.) Are Utah residents really called “Utahns”? That sounds like a minor character in the Jack Kirby NEW GODS comics, not a resident of the state of latter-day saints.

11.) I mean, they’re gonna do a smutty parody of the Lion King remake called THE LOIN KING, yeah?

12.) I’m still astonished that they haven’t tried to ironically market Miller Lite to the hipsters as “Miller Lit”.

13.) Ah, “don’t investigate Trump’s collusion with Putin, do you want a war with Russia?” That old chestnut. That’s right up there with “just let Hitler have Poland, I’m sure he’ll stop there and everything will end well.”

14.) I’ve always enjoyed that New York State kind of has three NFL teams but two literally play in New Jersey and one metaphorically plays in Saskatoon Canada. New York has, like, Schrodinger’s Football.

15.) I have realized that many of the hip-hop artists I have heard off but know little about, their stage names all sound like a font in Microsoft Word no one ever used. Offset? Check. Cardi B? Check. Post Malone? That’s a double check.

16.) Canada’s android protector Manitobot.

17.) I want Youtube to change its name to “Slightly Famous People Pretend To Be Friends”.