no8 in idea barrages

1.) Low-carb “pizza” snack: pepperoni sticks, string cheese, low-sodium V8. This is my life now.

2.) We’ve whittled down the American dream to “not dying homeless”. It’s a hell of a thing and it all started with Reagan slowly auctioning off our infrastructure piece by piece.

3.) You know what would raise our national discourse? A moratorium on cable news in public & semi-public spaces. Seriously. How much more civil would be to each other if we could at least escape Political Hot Takes in doctors offices and airports?

4.) A sitcom about Eminem’s transition from rapper to cop called MARSHALL LAW.

5.) A Phish holiday tour called EMMETT OTTER’S DRUGBAND CHRISTMAS.

6.) I finally realize how the dog regards me: I am the service animal he keeps around to help him deal with his crippling anxiety.

7.) If a fake diamond is “cubic zirconia” is a sex toy “pubic zirconia”?

8.) Sometimes I think about getting a Pinterest account, just so I could occasionally say “please allow me to pintroduce myself”.

9.) If so much of Adventure Time was about magic and candy, was there ever a Neccomancer?

10.) Negative progress can easily happen in one election, positive progress takes more time. Remember, Berniebros abandoning Clinton because they were privileged enough to be all or nothing edgelords is how we got into this mess. Yesterday was progress. Onward.

11.) Sometimes my life feels like Schrodinger’s Cat, with tons of evidence toward it being both weirdly impressive and a cascade of wasted potential, and I can’t know which is real until someone else observes it.