mar12 in idea barrages

  • March 12, 2018, 4:21 a.m.
  • |
  • Public

1.) The good thing about chasing something with no monetary collectors’ value like VHS of Jerry Maguire is that you can go on a thrift binge, like today, and even if you don’t get anything else, you still got the thrill of Finding Something. Today was a two Jerries day.

2.) Saying that major-sport college athletes “are paid with their scholarship” is built upon the lie that they’d be allowed to take challenging classes, anything above the bare minimum to count as students, when they go through the motions of attending classes at all.

3.) Are baby mermaids called minnowtaurs?

4.) You have no idea how much we wanted to follow that SUV until it stopped, with the dented bumper and all the Dave Matthews stickers, just to confront them and ask if someone “crashed into you… baby?”

5.) If Zuckerberg really wants to get America on his good side, here’s an act of charity that would work on so many levels, it would be unassailable: donate SO much money to “Kars For Kids” that they agree to never run a radio ad again.

6.) Start telling people that “song of sixpence” was about someone getting high off a pocketful of ergot-infected rye and hallucinating himself as a king who could talk to birds and that’s why “four and twenty” is a weed thing. It’s not true but it’s funnier than the truth.

7.) Everything short of birth, death, sustenance and sleep is a social construct. Sometimes being a social construct isn’t a bad thing, don’t get me wrong, but when it is, let it go.

8.) The facts we come screaming into this world alone & fade on out just as alone, true as they are, these are not what defines us. In the between, for a short moment, we are not alone and it is glorious. Scary confusing and glorious. Each others’ company, that’s what we’re here for.


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