ja24 in idea barrages

1.) If you estimate that your business was established during Eastern Standard Time, do you write “EST EST EST” on the door?

2.) The New Testament is actually called “Testament 2: His First Assignment” in the Steve Guttenberg Bible.

3.) THE RHYTHM IS GONNA GET YOU, THE RHYTHM IS GONNA GET YOU, FOR GOD’S SAKE RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THE RHYTHM IS ON THE LOOSE AND IT HAS TASTED HUMAN BLOOD

4.) Guessing the shape of someone’s skull solely from their social media contacts is the art of friendology.

5.) Weirdly, the fake president/admitted rapist Donald Trump has legitimized the horrors of the Un dictatorships in North Korea. In Trump, you see a man who clearly WANTS to be even more horrible than them and just can’t get away with it. Yet. He’s working on it.

6.) Is there a vegan veal substitute called “Veal Patrick Harris”? You could have him on the cover doing stage magic and be all “Is It Meat? No, It’s Magic!”

7.) Your app for dating 70s and 80s WWF jobbers, the little known heroes who’d lose to Andre or Hulk in three minutes on Saturday morning, will be called BrooklnBrawlr.

8.) While I am largely happy to be getting healthier, rarely does a few hours go by when I don’t want to stuff my face with pounds of panko breadcrumbs until I invariably choke and die in sated bliss.