a4 in idea barrages

1.) Once in a great while, I’ll catch the real me in a mirror for a moment, then he’s gone.

2.) If your Scooby Doo porn parody isn’t called “Screw Me Do” just give up as a pornographer and become an accountant.

3.) Funny how Trumpies use “cuck” as an insult when he is almost entirely defined by his slavish acquiescence to Vlad Putin.

4.) How did “The Middle” last nine years? It is so much MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE with the mom as the lead that they just took half the name.

5.) The time of night when you ask yourself “…are those dried herbs or ants?” but decide sleeping would be better than resolving that tonight.

6.) I hope that when the word “escapades” falls into disuse, The Ice Capades are still around and it confuses the hell out of people

7.) We live in a nation where people take selecting a new Lays Chip more seriously than voting for president. “Oh, Jill Stein, that sounds fun.”

8.) I mean, if the Illuminati exist, I hope their mission is “pyramids-are-rad awareness” because that’s all they’ve pulled off.

9.) Remember, when Trump’s fake administration uses terms like “fake news” and “cosmopolitan” they’re just translating Nazi phrases.

10.) As a damn Captain Planet villain, Trump recharges his energies with pollution, so of course he vacations in Jersey.

11.) it’s a cult of perspicacity, cult of perspicacity, cult of perspicacity…

12.) With the rise of Sarahah, I’m just waiting for it to pop off enough to churn out a parody of “Que Sera Sera” about it.

13.) can’t spell “insomniac” without “i”

14.) The sexists in the Bernie-dead-ender alt-left already trying to build an “ideologically impure moderate” narrative about Senator Harris. Because of course they are.

15.) “Ain’t no RULE says a DOG can’t be a PRIEST!” is my favourite line from AIR BUD 7: PET SEMINARY.

16.) Somewhere deep in every non-sociopathic conservative is someone who wants to love, to share, to help, to give but is afraid of consequences.