june27 in idea barrages

1.) I still say “emoji” sounds like a genie that listens to The Cure down there in the bottle.

2.) Paradoxically, only in urbane NYC can you get away with the Yankees embarrassingly corny radio home run calls.

3.) We all go to Hell twice, once for the torment and the lessons, once again to learn how to actually forgive ourselves.

4.) If you get surgery to fix your pitching arm, is that a shrewd business incision?

5.) A Bayformers movie ending w/ a credits-tag tease is like a Fast and the Furious film telling you to read more about cars at a local library.

6.) It’ll be part croissant, part gibberish. It’ll be the crovfefe.

7.) Sometimes Jesus gets so into re-watching BLUES BROTHERS He’ll keep making the joke “I’m an emission from God”.

8.) Now I gotta write a parody of “Country Roads” about Dusty Rhodes.

9.) Can’t spell “unrequited” without “quit”.

10.) LIFEHACK: Don’t have Amazon Prime so you can’t watch MAN IN THE HIGH CASTLE? Just watch Fox News. Same. Thing.

11.) Very rarely is anyone with “swagger” actually good at things and the few who are, they’re dangerous sociopaths to be avoided at all costs.