925 in idea barrages

1.) Your science-rock band’s name will be Density’s Child.

2.) Your renaissance emo band will be called Alchemical Romance.

3.) It’s like the song said, three is a magi number.

4.) Of course SUNY Utica-Rome/Poly/IT/Tech was involved in shady dealings. All businesses that change their name that often are.

5.) Does Henry Winkler have a craft beer called I.P.Ayyyyyyyye yet?

6.) Originally the Best Of Both Worlds cliffhanger was going to be Riker and Data combined by the Borg into some kind of Frakesenstein.

7.) Toast strawberry jam between two communion wafers. Voila, you have a Pope Tart.

8.) ESPN really needs to counterprogramme against Shark Week with Shaq Week.

9.) Laugh at me for eating my steak well-done when you think bloody raw is delicious but nothing tastes better than a lack of food poisoning.

10.) Sure, Freddy Krueger was a hideous murderer but you can’t deny he was living the dream.

11.) O broken Capulet, o shattered Montague, let us undo the curses, o let us superglue, let the fire of hate be dous-ed, epoxy both your houses.

12.) If you make a USB stick specifically for storing porn, call it a Flesh Drive.

13.) Of course your web browser has an inferiority complex, YOU’RE ALWAYS MINIMIZING IT.

14.) You know those terrible tee-shirts with a tux printed on? In Texas, do they have them with a bolo tie and a tan jacket?

15.) The villains on Scooby-Doo always ended up thoroughly demaskulated.

16.) Oh sure, when YOU do it, it’s “leaf peeping” but when someone ELSE does it, it’s “public urination”.

17.) Your association of stoners who really like the Three Stooges will have the slogan “You can’t spell SHEMP without HEMP!”

18.) The state is making yoga teachers all stress exercises that strengthen your Common Core.