93 in idea barrages

1.) The role that compliments the role of “Power Bottom” most is, of course, “Top Gun”.

2.) The Spider Man Homecoming/Spaghettios tie-in had BETTER use the phrase “with great power comes great pastabilities”.

3.) Start a soda line called Shawshank so that everyone can have a little joke to make when they trade in the empties for nickels.

4.) And on the pedestal these words appear: ‘My name is Ozymandias, I’m the best around, nothing’s ever gonna keep me down!’

5.) Your sci-fi novel about massive flooding in Northern California will be titled “Come Hella High Water”.

6.) When you own a zoo, name the section with Australian animals in it “Koala Lumpur”.

7.) To trick people into seeing how much they actually agree upon, use transverse psychology.

8.) Your novel about a tight-knit family of serial killers in a Welsh mining town will be called “How Gein Was My Valley”.

9.) Convince a Frenchman that you think Parisians are called Parisites.

10.) You are not the failed experiment you believe yourself to be. Your gestation’s just rougher and longer than most. You will still be amazing.

11.) “Diamonds On The Souls Of Her Shoes” is both a great song AND a song about a spoiled rich person that is itself culturally appropriated.

12.) Ayn Coulter is such a pitiless husk that even her own eyebrows are trying to escape her. That’s good on those eyebrows.

13.) Why do most country music stars these days have names that sound like WWF wrestlers? Luke Bryan, Jake Owen, Randy Houser, etc.

14.) In truth, the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing us greatness is to be measured in terms of success.

15.) Your electronica act will be called Hypnopotamus.

16.) Lying around won’t help you recover from a yeast infection, that’s just how you get bread sores.

17.) A parody of King Crimson’s “Cat Food” about Shaq-Fu might be my most painfully obscure idea yet.

18.) Your differences aren’t curses, they’re gifts to make you realize everyone’s different, to fill you with compassion and empathy.

19.) When portraying the artist Michelangelo at a ren faire, don’t forget his famous catchphrase “Thouabunga!”

20.) The Fonz protects the value of his intellectual property with an Ayyyyyyyy TM.

21.) Lets win the lotto tonight. Lets buy and tear down everything ruined. Lets build up something gorgeous and true. Lets win the lotto tonight.

22.) Your musical about the forbidden love between two Southern fratboys will be called Broklahoma.

23.) A truly underground house music experience called House Caverns.

24.) The effects of his erectile dysfunction medication were a long time coming.