610 in idea barrages
- June 9, 2016, 10:01 p.m.
- |
- Public
1.) A fanfiction where House M.D. is a time-traveling wizard who goes back to the start of Hogwarts and founds House House.
2.) A country and western fundraiser for Trump’s campaign would be a hateinanny.
3.) Your disturbing porn parody of FINDING DORY will of course be titled GRINDING DORY.
4.) Any time you write a name in all caps on Twitter, I imagine you screaming it like a dean who just got pranked in an 80s college comedy.
5.) The flipside of self-awareness is dithering about in a sea of doubt, like Hamlet without any of the money or cool pirates or spooky ghosts.
6.) Being chaotic good is a lot harder in real life. Being ethically transgressive is not a contradiction of terms but it’s a goddamn tightrope.
7.) Oh God, now I want a version of Hamlet where the Scooby-Doo gang is called in to investigate the ghost so bad.
8.) Considering we know Rick & Morty are refugees from a 2nd alt universe & Jerry might be from a 3rd, they’re a dimensionally blended family.
9.) Zombie divorce proceedings often come down to a matter of “He’s Dead, She’s Dead”.
10.) If you can’t handle me at my worst, I mean, I can’t blame you, that guy is kind of lame. But my best is pretty amazing.
11.) A poorly written memoir is autobio-degradable.
12.) Dr. Strange was battling a bunch of Baron Mordo clones but they weren’t as powerful as the original, more like Quasi-Mordos.
13.) Your shoegaze band will be called “Missing Personals”.
14.) If fake diamonds are cubic zirconia, are sex toys pubic zirconia?
15.) The name of the award for Best Actor In A Power Rangers Show every year is the Marlon Bandai.
16.) In my nightmare last night, I had superpowers and joined the Avengers but before every mission I crapped my pants and couldn’t go along.
17.) Now that the statute of limitations is up I can admit it was indeed I who let the dogs out and, frankly, I’m not sorry.
18.) If there are ever zombies but ones we can control and tame, you know the biggest thing on PPV will be “The Fight Of The Living Dead”.
19.) Sometimes sacrifices must be made but sometimes we are fresh out of goats.
20.) Dead clowns go to the humorgue.
21.) If you’ve suddenly turned on Sen. Warren because she endorsed Hilary, your devotion to progressive issues has been subsumed by Clinton hate.
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