417 in idea barrages

1.) Sure, you were a pioneer in nuclear physics but what have you done, Fermi, lately?

2.) You always hear about imitation crab meat but you never hear about mocktopus.

3.) Breakfast of champions, lunch of contenders, dinner of failures, Taco Bell Fourth Meal.

4.) A collection of greetings is a bale of hey.

5.) Whenever someone says “God don’t make no trash” it takes everything in me to not yell “DOUBLE NEGATIVES ARE TRASH!” at them.

6.) Twice today I saw a woman I thought I knew but each time I realized she just looked like that Kim Davis religious fascist lady. Small towns.

7.) One thing I’ve learned lately is that Albany-area comics uniformly believe “Niskayuna” is an inherently funny word.

8.) Let’s collect armchair baseball managers in our Twitter feeds and compete in fantasy-fantasy duels between them.