414 in idea barrages

1.) Howard Hughes let his fame and fortune trap him in a prison of solitary refinement.

2.) Some of us state the obvious, some of us state the spontaneous, others of us state the obfuscation and hope it passes for the other two.

3.) Needing a pill sorter with AM and PM slots doesn’t mean you’re old yet but it tells you how you’re vectoring toward it quickly.

4.) The establishment won’t cough up any of their ill-gotten bread so they’ve set up two larger-than-usual circuses for us, I guess.

5.) Ollie Walkies: The Dog That Made Walkies Famous.

6.) If you ever have to review a disappointing water park called Tube Land, just say “Too Bland” then drop that microphone.

7.) The Snap Chant is “oh God, oh God, I hope this actually erases, oh God, oh God, I hope this actually erases”.

8.) The blindfolded mystics each described the elephant as a snake, a spear, a throne, depending on who touched which part. The blindfolded agnostics got up and ran because those are all dangerous things if you’re smart. And while the agnostics and the mystics were all equally wrong, the mystics were the ones trampled to death and the agnostics lived to doubt another day.