411 in idea barrages

1.) Look SNL if you’re not gonna completely admit you’re terrible at least murder Weekend Update. The Daily Show killed it. Move on.

2.) The fact that there hasn’t been a Weird Al themed riff off the Sega Genesis “Moonwalker” game disappoints me every single day.

3.) You’d think a thief would be commitment-phobic but Robin was the Marion type.

4.) There ain’t no rule that says a dog can’t profit from an oil boom in… AIR BUD 35: THERE WILL BE BUD.

5.) If I could tweet from dreams, you guys would never be rid of me on here. Thank technology for not advancing yet.

6.) Of course you can add an Italian horror flick to the end of the festival, there’s always room for giallo.

7.) Do you know maguffins, man, maguffins, man, maguffins, man? do you know maguffins, man? they make the plot rotate.

8.) Bad comics got together and crowdfunded the OJ series and the Clinton campaign so they could recycle their hacky 90s jokes.

9.) The best way to avoid being a jerk with questionable ulterior motives is to consistently have no idea what you’re doing, I find.

10.) There was no charge for the confessional but you needed a free ticket to reserve your place in line and it read “Admit One”.

11.) Many battlefield surgeries are really just insinewations.