116 in idea barrages

1.) We joked for decades “here’s proof that Western Civilization is done” & then the Trump candidacy came along & it wasn’t funny anymore.

2.) “Where’s Superman?” the Martian Manhunter asked. “In Diana, J’onnz.” Batman replied.

3.) Bros weren’t clever when they started Icing each other they could’a done it w/ tequila shots & been all “Don’t Patron-ize me!”

4.) Yeah, I’m slippin’ into some DMs too. By which I mean, these cans of Dinty Moore.

5.) If you suffer from Celiac Disease, The Glu-Teng Clan ain’t nothin’ to lunch with.

6.) Hit on your dermatologist by whispering into her ear, “hold me closer tiny lancer”.

7.) Make sure your Olivia Newton-John party is a Xanadu not a Xandadud.

8.) Ain’t nothing in the world good about being respectable, unless you count the money, which is a mixed-blessing at best.

9.) There were days Billy Zane would wake up and even he was unsure if he was Jude Law or not.

10.) For Galactus, continental breakfast is a literal concept.

11.) facebook is the premiere platform on the internet for pictures of small dogs sleeping.

12.) My reaction to all claims of box-office records is “Adjusted For Inflation or GTFO”.

13.) Man, it’s a shame, the way the press is talking about Rickman, you’d think he was on Mars between Die Hard and Harry Potter.

14.) Weezer announces they haven’t realized there shouldn’t have been any Weezer after the second album and also tenth album.

15.) There are certainly WORSE remakes than “Point Break” but it is probably the LEAST NECESSARY remake ever.

16.) What we need are big budget high-sfx remakes of silent films. STEAMBOAT BILL, JR. THE GOLD RUSH. THE GREAT TRAIN ROBBERY. etc.

17.) Turkish president Erdogan is a totalitarian but that’s what you get when you elect a president “because he sounds like a Tolkien character”.

18.) SPOILER ALERT: On most cars, there’s no point to having a spoiler, it’s just cosmetic.

19.) Look, at least they didn’t ruin Halloween by releasing Bae Berry cereal. We have to give them that.