109 in idea barrages

1.) Would Seuss in the style of Shakespeare be samiambic pentameter?

2.) Exaggeration via use of twitter neologisms is EVERYTHING.

3.) Next time someone says they’re coming down with a fever, tell them “ooh, sick burn!” and then stare at them.

4.) Instead of prepping for the downfall of society we could put our energy into fixing it instead. I know. Crazy idea.

5.) Would Mediocrefinger be better or worse than Badfinger? I feel like it could go either way.

6.) Pattyhearst is a lot like Pattycake except you hate it at first but then grow to love it.

7.) The Pythagorean theorem is just another Grecian formula.

8.) “Martians are taking over the world?” he asked, relieved, “thank God, I thought Bruno Mars was invading and I’d have to listen to him.”

9.) History remembers President Martin Van Buren pretty well but often omits his sassy girlfriend Gina.

10.) So Mad Magazine calls him Tronald Dump, right? Seems like a no-brainer.

11.) When Red Skelton demanded we shouldn’t work blue, that was textbook bawdy-shaming.

12.) On Soviet Twitter, government follows YOU. Well. Also on American Twitter. Every state’s a surveillance state these days.

13.) Sid and Nancy Krofft.

14.) The secret is that I’m actually kinda handsome in an oafish way.