98 in idea barrages

1.) The one-ring was made out of cheese, to in the darkness bind them up.

2.) Get the phrase “Totally 80s” tattooed on your throat. When asked, proclaim yourself a radneck.

3.) Decency is not dishonesty. I won’t accept that proposition, no matter how much political juice that position gets for jerks.

4.) #TheOneLineYouHateMost “You’re overqualified, why would we even train you, you’ll just move to something better in four months.”

5.) Write an entire screenplay about gamblers, just to sneak in the line “Ben folds five.”

6.) Zatanna making fun of Superman’s weakness to magic by calling him “Mugg-El”.

7.) Applying the old “looks like a pump, feels like a sneaker” slogan to breast pumps just ends up coming off kind of weird.

8.) I fear that if I tried to make a “Flakka Seagulls” joke, not enough people would get both sides of the wordplay.