823 in idea barrages

1.) If Shaggy from Scooby-Doo were on facebook he’d like, like, everything.

2.) Calling an eggplant “eggplant” is like calling Greenland a “green land”. I guess “rubbery bitter horror-stump” would be wordy.

3.) In Soviet Russia, Party IS in your pants but only Party is invited.

4.) People wouldn’t think the “Hang In There, Baby” poster was so cute if Jesus were on it instead of a fuzzy kitten.

5.) Parody of “The Wind Cries Mary” about the Three Stooges’ Larry?

6.) Reimagine “I’ve Got You Under My Skin” as an ode to burrowing insects.

7.) “America is Better Than Some Places But Not As Many As It Thinks” probably isn’t pithy enough for a hat.

8.) If I was ever thin, I don’t know what I’d do when I crossed my arms. I have such a nice place to rest my elbows, as is.