july capstone barrage in idea barrages

1.) You could trade her dumplings for sex because she was a wonton trollop.

2.) Some people won’t use a two-person dildo, even if you double-dong-dare them.

3.) All we can hope is Trump teaches libertarians to change because guys like him in charge of everything is the libertarian end-game.

4.) “They’re gonna need Hazmat suits if they wanna remodel this bar because your ass is the bestos.”

5.) Your lifelong struggle with poetry may have started with a simple Yeats Infection.

6.) The world’s nowhere near ending. As individuals we know we will sooner or later and we simply project it onto the world.

7.) When hashtags are no longer a thing, there’s gonna be this huge swath of cultural backlog incomprehensible to the young.

8.) His Final Fantasy jokes were good but old, he needed to work on some new materia.