66 in idea barrages

1.) When its onion rings tossed in a fattening sauce, that’s Fieri. When a fried butter bomb makes you just wanna vom, that’s Fieri. When your show needs a guy who could ruin pizza pie, that’s Fieri!

2.) A great name for an MST3K knock-off show would be “Riffer Madness”.

3.) If you can’t take the heat, get into Kitchener. It’s up in Canada. It’s relatively cool weather up there.

4.) Dr. Sam Beckett is suddenly holding a big foam sword in an uncomfortably hot field. It’s called “Quantum LARP”. It’s… pretty terrible.

5.) Battlestar Galactica was constantly violating their right to remain Cylons.

6.) Convince someone that you think Fleek means that little blue monkey on SUPER FRIENDS. Act really really confused.

7.) The GOP has become a contest to see who can be furthest out on the wrong side of history so yeah there IS a difference between the parties.

8.) Intellect isn’t about knowing facts falsely regarded as written in stone. That’s memorization. Intellect is the ability to change and grow.

9.) I should have totally told people that when I set foot in Brooklyn again after three years, these goofy sideburns suddenly appeared.

10.) A great name for a yoga class where you listen to terrible nu-metal while working out would be Namastaind.

11.) I have a hard time performing by half-measures because I go all in so as to overwhelm my lack of confidence, not for performative effect.

12.) The cake mix has powdered egg in it already. They only make you add an egg to make you feel like you did something. America.

13.) They love pretending there’s all kinds of voter fraud so they can prevent the disenfranchised from voting. There isn’t. They love pretending there’s all kinds of public assistance fraud so they can prevent the disenfranchised from eating. There isn’t!

14.) They claim that Ketchupgate is actually about ethics in school-lunch vegetable designation journalism.