513 in idea barrages

1.) When someone says “why can’t we all just be Americans?” ask them to consider why they have the luxury to think like that.

2.) Interestingly, the zombie fad bit nerd culture and it became a slow moving undying wreck of empty shambling zombie references.

3.) What’s really fun is singing a theme song with the title as the only lyric. “JAWS-Jaws. JAWS-Jaws. Jaws-JAWS-Jaws-JAWS…“

4.) Accept the bad but focus on the good. Be skeptical but not cynical. Buy lotto but don’t count on it. Practice realistic optimism.

5.) Getting old is easier culturally when you were never cool to begin with. The things that used to be cool are out? No skin off my unhip ass.

6.) An album of electronic dance music about Wolverine. Call it “Bubstep”.

7.) Johnsonville Brats, we need to have a talk. I am Italian and don’t know a goddamned soul in the mob. You screw off huge, huh?

8.) FDR knew what current wealth denies: disparity can make a privileged class so small it can be “drowned in a bathtub”. To use their phrase.

9.) Are the JEM and SUICIDE SQUAD promotional disasters all an attempt to make JURASSIC WORLD look less bad by comparison?

10.) Revel in your contradictions except when you can’t.

11.) Another great one is “this frozen pizza is not intended as a microwave food”. Oh Ellio’s. You don’t really believe that.

12.) If you’re going to make a sequel to Double Indemnity, at least call it Quadruple Indemnity.