april capstone in idea barrages

1.) If you’re gonna sell a diet beef stew, at least have the style to call it “Dainty Moore”.

2.) You are amazing. You are also pretty messed-up. I’m not sure if they’re intertwined or just both there but you have to accept both of them.

3.) They could’a called those “Will It Blend?” videos “Boy Meet Whirled”. Everything would be better with me in charge, guys.

4.) A version of the Ghostbusters theme about Tom Brady with the line “Bundchen makes me feel good”.

5.) Of course I’m drinkin’ coffee. It’s 5AM somewhere.

6.) “Local Boy Makes Good” is beaten to shreds by “Local Man Makes Good”. Maybe if you’re grown-up first, making good won’t ruin ya.

7.) People try to shape reality w/ weasel-words to force narrative on a situation. Unless this is 1300s India “thug” is one of them.

8.) Studio execs are a superstitious and cowardly lot. Anything that isn’t prequel, sequel, reboot or adaptation strikes terror in their hearts.

9.) The song “No Diggity” was banned for years in Utah because they thought it said “No Bigamy”.

10.) I hope “that” becomes a curse word so “you say that like it’s a bad thing” becomes unintelligible as a phrase.

11.) I could probably never have a one-night stand, except with maybe a lady cop because it’d be so transgressive.

12.) I’d like to see the D&D version of a doomsday prepper. Dwarven ranger named Woodpunk Charcloth hoarding Adventurer’s Kits, I dunno.

13.) “Isn’t that just like a cop?” he said “Brings a gun to an idea fight.”

14.) It’s a reality show about proposing film reboots. It’s called “Will It Bland?”