425 in idea barrages

1.) Local pride is awesome but regional pride is even better. If there’s gas in the car, we can get some REAL cool stuff going!

2.) The dog was so happy to see Mom after two weeks, he literally pissed the couch with excitement. The weird weird little dude.

3.) Sometimes you want to be alone with your starches, sometimes you need garbohydrates.

4.) Declare yourself a freelance monarch. I just did. I can knight people now, it’s great.

5.) Listening to Mets game on Yankee station, heard the “this copyrighted broadcast, blah blah, expressed written consent” sponsored by law firm. Western Civilization!

6.) I’ve blown it a few times. I’ve been screwed over six times as often. But now I’ve shot a paralyzing dart into the fat lady’s vocal chords.

7.) Like the Boston rabbi said, “no ham, no foul”.

8.) To this day, when someone makes their child or pet their profile picture, I still wanna accuse them of being a shapeshifter.

9.) There’s a difference between making a living and making capitalism your holy religion.

10.) Limbaugh - The Thug, Palin - The High-Visibility Woman, O’Reilly - Mr. Fascistic & Hannity - The Human Bore: The Fascistic Four!

11.) My newest name for a band: The Participation Ribbons.