barrage friday in idea barrages

1.) To opendiary friends on prosebox, I am sorry I’m a crappy noter on that platform. I dunno, it’s a very different format, I’ll try to get better. I am reading, though!

2.) I’m astonished Dennys or IHOP doesn’t do a turkey-and-waffles platter for the holidays. Too busy pumpkin-spicing everything?

3.) Looking at the high school marching bands at the ‪Macys Parade‬, I can’t help but wonder how many are pregnant.

4.) Does Peter Pan Live look like the worst thing EVER or just the worst thing that isn’t a war atrocity ever? Only way it could be interesting would be if it was broken up by Ferguson protestors or Walken converted to Satanism live.

5.) Hell hath no furries. Even Satan is wigged out by them.

6.) I’m thankful for my loved ones, for writing, for performing & for better luck in the next year as this one has been frustrating.

7.) Drank from a 44 year old bottle of slivo that my Grandmother had received upon my Great-Grandfather Albin’s passing in 1978. The occasion of my brother home and healthy, she said, was worth finally opening it. Very mellow. Like a sacrament. Very special.

8.) The snow cuts in all ways, making scrambled eggs of highways, covering the old things up to lie in wait for a while. but only a while.

9.) This holiday weekend, use the phrase “describing pornography to the blind” in a metaphor. You’ll thank me for it.

10.) Ripping hunks off a brick of mozz and just eating it is the thinking man’s pizza.

11.) Forget it, Jake… it’s Statefarmtown.

12.) When the post-apocalypse comes, I’m with whoever has the vision to make Disneyland their war fortress.

13.) Canadian bluesmen pull off a series of donut shop heists to save an orphanage. It’s called TIM BANDITS. It’s… pretty terrible.

14.) My memories are filled with songs and movies, I’m astonished my mind hasn’t been hit with a copyright take-down yet.

15.) Ollie the dog always complains about having to poop in the snow, nevertheless I walk him in a whimper wonderland.

16.) If having been burned by Star Wars too many times to be jazzed up by one trailer means you’re dead inside, just call me Mr. Zombo.