Why Sexting is Not Morally Wrong. in The Napkin.
- Oct. 30, 2013, 11:16 a.m.
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- Public
I just thought of a scathing counterexample as to why sexting is not morally wrong nor could be constituted cheating by any reasonable person.
Let us suppose sexting is wrong because it constitutes some sexual act with another person. But what is sexting? A series of text messages with a sexual undertone with the intent to arouse and stimulate. Our recipient sextor would read a sexual message, masturbate, and reply. An exchange of communication that would seem to be akin to long-distance mutual masturbation. Our sextors might even send pictures to each other for visual erotic stimulation.
Now. Imagine that all of the responses that our recipient sextor receives is actually generated by a computer. The sextor reads erotic messages, masturbates, replies. An efficient computer could even produce erotic imagery to complete the illusion.
Now, what moral crime has been committed? At best, the sextor is guilty of masturbating while thinking about something other than the offended partner. And if masturbation is somehow wrong, well, that's fucked up. Not a person alive hasn't let their mind wander during sex with their partner just a little. It doesn't necessarily mean the care for their partner is less, it's JUST THOUGHTS.
And the last thing we should do is accuse people of being thought-criminals.
Anyway, just a fascinating thought I have.
Cat Mommy ⋅ October 29, 2013
May not be morally wrong but it sure can be hurtful to your partner. The fact is it's not a computer on the other end, you are talking (not thinking) to a real person about doing things with them that are meant for you and your partner (if you're in a monogamous relationship, of course). I know when it happened to me it broke my heart. It wasn't sexting, it was "phone sex" but very similar.
Timmy™ Cat Mommy ⋅ October 29, 2013
Got an image a Stephen Hawking-like voice trying to sound sexy. Eeek, not doable.
Context is always a key; I'm a moral relativist.
Cat Mommy Timmy™ ⋅ October 29, 2013
Oh. My. God. Thank you for making me swallow my water the wrong way thinking of that image!
Parallax. ⋅ October 29, 2013
IF the person sexting was actually talking to a computer, then you're right, no problem. Thing is, though, that people who sext outside of their relationship aren't talking to a computer - they're usually talking to that hot guy they met at work, or that sexy blonde from their uni lectures, or that friend of the opposite sex who they "totally don't have a thing for, I promise, baby!"
My point is, is the communication is computer-generated, then fine. Who cares. It would be akin to watching porn. But if the person replying to the sexts is a real, breathing man or woman and the person doing it is in a relationship, then no. That's some bullshit right there.
Timmy™ Parallax. ⋅ October 30, 2013
Ah, intent and knowledge.
The difference between buying a blow-up doll and buying a hooker.
Deleted user ⋅ October 29, 2013
Just for the sake of argument:
Axiom: Immorality, broadly speaking, involves one person knowingly hurting another.
Thesis: Sexting, whether to a computer or a person is immoral if and only if a partner of one of the sexting parties is hurt by it (emotionally, as physicality doesn't enter into it.). This requires that a) the partner knows about the sexting and b) finds it hurtful. It also requires that the sexting party know or suspect that partner would be hurt by it. This gives several possible outs, including "Oh, partner will never know," which may (or may not) be true, but it may lead to lying which isn't perfectly honest and upright, or actual cheating (humans are weak, after all and do succumb to temptation.)
Timmy™ Deleted user ⋅ October 30, 2013
.......Of course, my partner might be hurt if I forget to take the trash out, but of course that's just splitting hairs. : D
AnOrangeZebra ⋅ October 30, 2013
ummm yes! exactly. also if someone is thinking of someone else during masturbation and or sex we shouldnt look at porn either. :-0