oct 18 in idea barrages

ABANDON METER, BECOME PROSE.

Even though I don’t like eating candy corn, The Candy Corn Discourse is so heavy, it makes me WANT to like it.

A non-alcoholic strip club called BOTTOMLESS COFFEE.

If they named a COVID variant after Phil Collins, we could be like “I dunno, I’m not going to that party, I don’t wanna get The Collins. I can just… feel it, coming in the air tonight. Oh Lord. Oh Lord.” That’d be SOMETHING outta this whole mess.

If you use a third-party delivery service to get your hoagie, that’s a sub contractor.

Yes, I’m mentally transposing the lyrics to “Poker Face” into the rhythm of “Danke Schoen”. You aren’t?

LESS INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY, MORE INTELLECTUAL PROPRIETY!

Why call it “a witch’s hex” when you can call it “moderate-to-severe Crone’s disease”?