102 in idea barrages

1.) “Flattery” suggests that I’m a liar. I don’t lie. I merely time my truths well.

2.) You know that TLC would take a pitch for a reality show about a bearded lady. YOU KNOW THIS.

3.) Why do boner-pill ads always love being by the sea shore? #TBSalwayshasterriblecommercials

4.) An absence of meaning or a meaning of absence? A near-mint soul is hardly excellent or even very good, it’s poor.

5.) A picture of Philip J Fry in a yellow raincoat captioned “I See What You Did There Last Summer”.

6.) Village People, we were never trying to stop the music. We only wanted to stop YOUR music.

7.) I’m not rooting for a plague but if a virus is going to decimate America, of COURSE it starts in Texas.

8.) Your sleep schedule being wrecked by hunger pains not from a lack of food but from weight loss attempts is the ultimate first world problem.

9.) I want to manage a super villain themed New Wave band called The Doomtown Rats.

10.) The subtext to CARTOON ALL-STARS TO THE RESCUE is that if you do drugs, all your favourite cartoon characters will come & visit you. Hooray!

11.) Oh God, no Halloween-spooky twitter names. Please? Not again. It demeans us all.

Last updated October 09, 2014