nv 10 in idea barrages

A detective novel about a crime-solving bartender called “First-Degree Muddler”.

2 Olive 2 Gardenous: When You’re Here, You’re Family

A sitcom about the collapsing housing market called REALTY CHECK.

A terrible name for a porno would, of course, be ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN BACK.

If I were a lawyer serving notice, I would dress up like Pee-Wee Herman and have “Tequila” blaring behind me as the front door and say nothing until the point in the song where they go “Tequila!” and I’d hand it to them with the single word “SUPOENA!”

If there’s ever a crime wave of people stealing returnable redeemable bottles and cans, I just want every paper and teevee station to use the headline EMPTY THREAT.

I was in the perfect generational Venn Diagram to understand how hilarious a combination of Ross Perot and Yoda “Ross Peroda” would’ve been. Now, of course, Perot is a historical footnote and Star Wars is an exhausted shell of itself, but back then? GOLD.

The next Fantastic Four movie should cast John Cena as the Invisible Woman. Think how much they’d save on effects!