oct 28 in idea barrages

Write a book called “How To Hunt Porch Pirates” so that people can order it from Amazon, leave it on their porches for the thieves so that when they open the stolen mail, they get the fear of God put into them.

Quantum pirates make you walk the Plancks. Constantly.

A hip-hop parody about aging called “Funky Cold Edema”.

You’ve built your time machine. You know what must be done. You’re going back into the past to fix the present. You’re going to stop Mumford from having sons.

If only more people knew David Bowie’s “Port of Amsterdam” I could do a banger parody of it about Instagram.

At the Coping. Coping Cabana. Make any excuse that you wanna.

I just realized that I couldn’t get into that Ted Lasso show because the main character is just toxic positivity incarnate. I try my level best to be positive but, like, realistically positive, actionably positive, not like gosh-golly unrelenting empty pollyanaism.

“I dunno, I just woke up feeling really run-down and really smugly self-satisfied…” “Were you listening to U2 recently?” “why in fact, I was…” “Dude, you need to go get checked out for Bononucleosis.”