july 10 in idea barrages

CUDDLELINGUS.

There aren’t enough jokes about the workers at the Cheesecake Factory seizing the means of production.

I feel like KFC never leaned into the Kernels / Colonels pun with their popcorn chicken and that’s probably why it never became the juggernaut it could’ve become.

All the science-fiction and superhero movies are about alternate realities and parallel universes now because the echo chambers of social media have us all in parallel universes of imagined reality while living on the same real Earth. It’s actually kinda poetic.

A reality show about finding the best fisherman or best fisherwoman would be boring as hell… but for the title CASTING CALL it might be worth it.

I’d never been able to say “there is a winter hat in the men’s room toilet” before but, hell, every day is an adventure, isn’t it.

Sometimes life feels like a game of musical chairs that passed you by, left you flat out on your arse, may as well sprawl out on your back, look up and watch the stars. That’s what I’m tryna do, anyway.

There were, like, two wars fought over 200 years ago for the expressed purpose of Americans not having to give a fart in a tornado about the British monarchy and who would I be if I rejected the fruits of their sacrifice?