Train Discipline. in The Napkin.

Feeling calmer again. Still can’t quite pin down all the causes. I got groceries, unlike my last pair of days off. I did a round of dishes, unlike my last round of days off. Focused more on the episode of Lower Decks I watched. Was intimidated for my deadlift day, but hit some personal bests as a matter of course.

“If you aren’t in the mood to train your muscles, train your discipline.” Or something like that. Someone said that in response to someone asking yet again where motivation comes from when you’re not in the mood to lift. As I say so often, life isn’t a Rocky montage. Plenty of workouts, I go, punch the line, hit my marks, get maybe one more repetition, and leave.

It didn’t even occur to me I set a new 3RM until minutes after the pull. (Previous best was 2 @ 355 lbs - today I hit 3 @ 355 lbs.) Unless my memory is off, the triple came up smoother than the double.

I thought maybe it was my cycle of overusing my preworkout. (Caffeine, folks.) Maybe, I’m not sure. Might have been some of the horny goat weed earlier in the week. Never occurred to me that if it acted as a stimulant, there would be a depressive lull afterwards. So to speak. After last week’s orgasm, my libido died.

Had an organic orgasm earlier today, and that always helps my headspace.

(“Timmy, wtf is an organic orgasm.” The ones where you indulge in pleasure because you’re in the mood, rather than “Huh, been a few days, do my organs still work?”. Or the ones where you want to be horny, but your body isn’t responding as well. This was one of those where my mind wasn’t that horny, but the body was responsive. If that makes sense.)

Last week’s Upper B absolutely dragged. I was so exhausted by the end. I should have decent sleep tonight, so it should go easier. Which means Sunday’s squat should go easier. Which means Monday’s Upper C should go easier.... Just fatigue management.

Oh.

I had oatmeal this morning. One of those “small factors” that might mean more than I realize. I’ve been getting lazy and just having whey for breakfast. Same calories. But fairly good chance oatmeal stabilizes blood sugar far more.

It’s… a feeling like I have to keep grinding to prove something to myself. If nothing else that I can set my mind to something and do it. Sure, I’m lazy with simple things. But I had months in the past two years when I couldn’t do anything. It’s like I need to be able to look back, point, and say “See. See what I did. I’m better now.”

Week 10 of 27 of my progression. Who the hell makes a 27 week plan? If progression holds, I’ll hit a 185 bench, 225 row, and a 405 deadlift. Will I get there? Well. Only one way to find out.

Oh, since twenty-seven sounds intimidating, I broke it into five phases. Four phases of six weeks apiece (24 wks) followed by a final 3 weeks. Spend enough time reading routines and you realize the semantics of a lot of it is just needless marketing gimics to sound fancier than it is.

Eh, whatever. May you find your weekly base cycle.