july 13 in idea barrages

The whole continuity of the Mario Brothers makes a lot more sense if all the Donkey Kong games are Wario posing as Mario to frame him for being a jerk to monkeys.

Only years and years later did I realize that if the “Goodbye Blue Monday” bar had a stand-up open mic, it should’ve been called “Laughterhouse-Five”.

A washed-up football star is forced to direct a high school drama club as community service in PLAYMAKERS.

In Dungeons and Dragons, does constipation trigger an attack of opportunity? I mean, you’re forcing a movement.

How great would Urkel have been if all his catchphrases had been delivered with a defeated exhaustion, blaming himself but too tired to even do that with vigor? “…did I do that?” “…whoa, mama” “…I’m wearing you down.” “…I don’t have to take this… I’m going home…”

“Oh, you misunderstood. This didn’t have argon oil in it, it has Arkin oil in it. We squeeze our Alan Arkin clones fresh daily.”

Lucas, from behind the ruined shattered mask: “Fandom didn’t kill Star Wars. I killed Star Wars.”

Leave shiny pebbles out in the trees until the corvids aid you against your enemies. Call it “crowfunding”.