Xenophobia. in The Napkin.

  • June 3, 2021, 12:34 a.m.
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No idea if pre-anxiety is a thing.

I was in good spirits this morning. Energetic isn’t really the word, more like drive. “Oh, I’ll do this, okay then this, don’t forget this.” It’s rare I bother cooking beans/rice before 10 am.

First days are always mindless orientation, so it’s difficult to gauge what the actual job will be like. Wondering what the coworkers will be like. Good staff makes all the difference.

There’s the self-doubt of my abilities, which I try to assuage.

There’s also the echoes of when I had a panic attack at my last job. I fear having something like that happen again. Then again, I know the circumstances surrounding that…

As for working in the evening, I did that at Panera. And I was nonpulsed. I just didn’t care when I worked, though I still liked mornings, even then.

Maybe it’s the hurry up and wait.


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