dec 23 in idea barrages

While carving D&D miniatures out of soft wood, you sing to yourself “an orc is an orc of cork, of cork, and no one can talk to an orc of cork, though some would fork on speech to orcs, if the orc is Mr. Grork”…

5,000 years ago: “Hey, Stonk, y’know cucumbers?” “Yeah, they’re all bitter & watery & full of seeds.” “Right? Y’know what we should do with them?” “I don’t know, Pickle, what?” “Let’s put them in some sour-ass juice for a week then pretend they’re delicious. As a prank.”

Ed Sheeran’s album of Fleetwood Mac covers will be called “Blandslide”.

Your Guy Fieri erotic fan fiction will be called TAKE-OUTS, MAKE-OUTS AND FAKE-OUTS. It will be a sin against all things right and good, securing your spot in Hell.

The dread vampire Count Von Bovi, wanted: undead or alive.

Now we reap the bitter harvest of all those who thought American Democracy so strong they could allow a Trump victory because their cult of Bernie was more important than the free world back in 2016. This is what you asked for when you said “Clinton’s not enough”. Your impatience damned us all.

In the end, it wasn’t the good people who did nothing that allowed evil to win. Rather, good people who did less than nothing, tilting at impossible windmills instead of joining in on the pragmatic work of doing the good they could, wasting effort on short-term impossibilities.

Ninja Turtles 2: The Secret of the Ooze was a super-shredder event.