april 9 in idea barrages

1.) I don't look like a James Dean/True Blood muscle-twink like TV tells women they're supposed to want but it doesn't make me any less awesome.

2.) I can't remember what I had for lunch yesterday but I can still tell you "Grant Hill drinks Sprite".

3.) Climbing the Empire State Building? There's an ape for that.

4.) Oh the things I could do with a modicum of resources or the courage to fail.

5.) In ancient Rome, gangstas killed you by popping an asp in your cap.

6.) Nights like these I feel like the Mycroft Holmes of a dying popular culture, holed up in a handful of places, marking my time.

7.) SUPER MARIO BROTHERS: EPISODE TWO: THE PHANTO MENACE.

8.) If someone creates a robot to do body shop work on cars and doesn't call it "Autocorrect" they've failed at their job.

9.) If he had any way to take back his offensive joke about infomercials, he would. But you know how it goes. SAID IT and REGRET IT.

10.) So if anyone knows how to get paid to just filk comedy music at comic book conventions tell me how that works. I'll find a band.