july 15 in idea barrages

An Ernest P Worrell themed episode of DRAG RACE called “Camp Goes To Ernest”

Somehow, the least believable part of the horror that is 90 Day Fiancee are the couple who go to bed with, and wake up with, perfectly applied make-up. That’s some Lucy and Ricky in separate beds but pregnant reality break.

Most of the time, things are hidden not because they are “What They Don’t Want You To Know” but because they are terrible harmful lies made to steal money from people thrashing around blindly for answers they’re comfortable with.

Has anyone told Highlights yet that now Goofus would be the better one? Goofus would be chilling in his house, ordering pizza and playing video games while Gallant would be reopening his dad’s BMW dealership early to “own the libs”.

I hope Rufus Wainwright has a character he plays sometimes who is his idiot redneck twin Doofus Wainwright.

Krang Krang! On the door, baby! Krang Krang! On the door! Krang Krang on the door, you’re what? Smaaaaaaalll pink BRAIN THING.

“Genital herpes? Yeah, that’s pretty bad… but do you know what’s really bad?” Justin Timberlake whispers to you, “Genital Harpies.”

Sometimes I wonder if MATILDA and CARRIE were in the same universe.