april 4 in idea barrages

  • April 4, 2014, 11:47 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

1.) The fortune cookie said "you are almost there". From your crust to the ears of The Great Magnet, noble sweetbread.

2.) grow grow grow your boat/trees become canoes/dare to dream, dare to dream, dare to dream, dare to dream/we become things too

3.) And really what's a trailer to a kids animated sequel without a bunch of catchphrases that are seven years behind the zeitgeist?

4.) I'd never realized how much basketball's Blake Griffin looks like Seth Rogen before. It doesn't mean anything but there we are.

5.) Mayan Angelou is definitely a band name waiting to be born.

6.) If that's what an Unchained Melody sounds like, for God's sake, let us chain it back up.

7.) During Prohibition, of course, it was less mulled wine and more muled wine.

8.) I turn on the news and on every channel, there's socio-economic Stockholm Syndrome. So I put on cartoons.

9.) Has there been a book about marketing called Choose Your Own Ad Venture yet?

10.) I see an Olmos/almost "Who's On First" skit brewing.

11.) Feminine looking men who are traditionally masculine in their actions are so last season, ladies. Big gregarious weirdos are the new sexy.

12.) An eating-weird-food show called Gastronauts.

13.) I don't have a t-shirt company but if I ever do, it will certainly be called Bullshirt.

14.) Running a message board will overwhelm you if you do it too much but you can enjoy it in moderation.

15.) Cinnamon-brown sugar is the Platonic ideal of lazy ready-made breakfast pastry. Pop Tart, Toaster Strudel, what have you.


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