jan 5 in idea barrages

I like to believe that King Vitaman cereal is no longer made because there was a bloody anti-royalist revolution and he was probably replaced by, oh, Comrade Crunch.

When Bizarro Superman tries to do a reverse image search, he ends up just doing an image search.

If you can spin your flaccid phallus so fast that you fly away, you have become a fellacopter.

A bumper sticker that reads NUNS DO IT OUT OF HABIT.

Consider convincing Alex Jones that The International House of Pancakes is coming to take his guns.

To truly succeed as a flightless bird, one must be unflappable.

You can watch one more Italian horror film. There’s always room for giallo.

A prequel to “Desperately Seeking Susan” called “Passively Seeking Susan”.