Marrchage the Fourteenth in idea barrages

1.) Causality and entropy, those two bastards breathing down on me.

2.) My mom's crazy dog refuses the boots and I just end up carrying him back in when he gets cold after he poops.

3.) Why? Because montage. Always because montage.

4.) The key to kickstarting your natural childbirth is getting all the stretch goals.

5.) The airlines discontinued meal service not to save money but rather in a desperate attempt to force comedians to be less hacky.

6.) "Super Hornio Brothers 2? Wasn't that just a re-skin of Doki Doki Penis?" -@ZacLaCroix

7.) And I mean, really, how can you KNOW you wouldn't like making out with me if you haven't tried it for... 20 or 30 minutes?

8.) "Shine On You Crazy Diamond" about dragons, somehow?

9.) You can't argue with success. Because success is a concept. So it doesn't have a mouth.

10.) A parody of Beach Boys "Kokomo" about the Commodore 64? seed-phrase: "Amiga, Bahama, come on pretty mama".

11.) When I saw the hashtag #TGIF I was hoping for .gifs of the old Mr. T Ate My Balls meme. Because I am internet-old.

12.) CASH RUINS EVERYTHING AROUND ME.

13.) I'm declaring every part of my life as in-continuity. No more extended-lifeyverse stuff. It's all canon. Every moment.

14.) HOT SINGLES IN YOUR AREA, WAITING TO BE CONVERTED INTO TEPID FIVES AND COOL TENS TO MAKE ROOM IN YOUR WALLET

15.) Just keep referring to your doctor as "pill wizard". Like "oh pill wizard, heal me with thine wares!" Keep it up.