july 16 in idea barrages

1.) “WORKERS OF THE CHEESECAKE FACTORY UNITE! SEIZE THE MEANS OF CHEESECAKE PRODUCTION!” would be one hell of a bumper sticker.

2.) Your Electric Light Orchestra parody about Rachel Ray will be called “EVOO Woman”. It will be astonishingly terrible.

3.) The only confidence more powerful than that of a mediocre white man is the confidence of a social media website CONVINCED that you want a sneak peak at all its AMAZING UPCOMING NEW FEATURES.

4.) Your Neil Young parody about the Insane Clown Posse will be called “Juggalo Springfield Again”.

5.) LIFE HACK: looking to save money on your animated series? just have all characters communicate solely via telepathy!

6.) In Doctor Mario 2, he uses pills to suppress a Doki Doki Panic Attack.

7.) A head-canon where Captain Ahab actually hates Moby Dick so much out of jealousy because he himself internally identifies as whale-kin and “Ahab” isn’t his legal name, he just calls himself that because he was “Assigned Human At Birth”.

8.) AN INDECENT PROPOSAL reboot except as a prequel: AN INDECENT PROMPOSAL.