june 13 in idea barrages

1.) A decital is like a recital except instead of doing something you’ve practiced labouriously, it’s something you’ve never practiced at all. You could do like an improv comedy decital or a improvisational jazz decital.

2.) How could you name your horror movie REDNECK ZOMBIES when you could’ve called it DEADNECKS?

3.) The fact that Shredded Wheat does not use a mascot that is a sick-ripped bodybuilder made of sheaves of grain, it’s a small symptom of the larger problem of how boring and unimaginative our culture is.

4.) I call the tubing in the big pump carafe things The Gonzos because they look like Gonzo’s nose.

5.) UNPOPULAR OPINION: whatever you thought of the Ghostbusters reboot, the idea of the old cast returning for a Ghostbusters 3 that is basically “Ghostbusters 2 except everyone is like 70” is far worse and deeply crushingly depressing.

6.) My Dune based Green Day parody will surely involve the line “I walk the Golden Path, on the boulevard of Muadib.”

7.) Why has a chicken rode the cross? So all chickens can get to the other side.

8.) A poet of cake decoration, a veritable Robert Frosting.