may13 in idea barrages

Sure sure, keep having your proms, just know you’re making the Big Limo Lobby stronger with every awkward move to third base in the back.

Nothin’ like a 40 deep line at baggage claim to say “American Airlines didn’t just screw the pooch, they screwed the whole damned litter.”

Pac Man usin’ one of those trendy gender swap filters, angry when it merely adds a bow to his profile pictures.

As I’m getting used to a standing job for the first time in a while, my ankles get cranky before falling asleep at night and I’ve started callin’ ‘em “crankles”. They appreciate the word play, as all good ankles do.

Sometimes you want to blame all the people who fell for a fraud out of stupidity but that’s not the real problem. Blame the smaller number of people who knew better and played along out of cowardice or personal benefit.

I hope the head wizard’s college frat nickname was “Stumbledoor” but contractually obligated prequels never cover that kind of thing.

Sometimes a good pun is ruined by my forgetting how to make accent marks, like a wine fund raiser for a zoo called Gnus N’ Rose.

You’ll know I have a thin week for flash fiction when I do something with my “Phantom of The Grand Ol Opry” pitch.