nov5 in idea barrages

1.) Freudy Krueger… he’ll analyze your dreams TO DEATH.

2.) I’m just a somewhat fat guy, looking into a mirror and singing “GET UP, c’mon GET DOWN WITH MY THICKNESS, GET UP c’mon GET DOWN WITH MY THICKNESS” while I do a little dance.

3.) Count the miles, count the towns, count the places where there once were bustling stores and now there are just Dollar Generals… Dollars General?… filling the spaces in-between.

4.) Dipping pickles into melted chocolate is an obvious fondon’t.

5.) The fear of failure is so much stronger than the fear of not succeeding. It is a general flaw of the human species, sure, but I fear I exhibit it most acutely.

6.) Death, evized by bluest azure screen, hath come ‘pon thine compute machine. Fatal exception hath occurred, a new device to be procured. You doubtlessly did something dumb, to send it to what dreams may come.

7.) A piece of playground equipment that changes colour depending on the emotional state of the person using it called a “mood swing”.

8.) The dog the cat and I adventured out into the chill of the extra hour, as the dog demanded defecation but none was produced, he simply peed and licked the due off grass until the cat and I, disgusted both, dragged him back inside.

9.) A painting of an attractive woman in her early 40s in leopard print everything, sitting in a rocking chair, called “Whistler’s Step-Mother”.

10.) In Soviet early internet, Jeeves asks YOU!

11.) With every passing day, Russell Brand looks more like Charlie Manson and it’s WEIRD.

12.) If I had to create the world’s grossest drink that was still technically edible, it would probably involve gin and kombucha.

13.) The truly entitled aren’t those needing and receiving help from the public commons, the truly entitled are those who reaped the public common’s benefit but would now tear it down so they’re not inconvenienced or, indeed, sell it off to further profit themselves.

14.) Mixed-model social safety net driven states are uniformly the most stable and effective but there’s no profit in for the entrenched business class, so those interests exploit identity politics to reject it. “You don’t want x minority/dirty poor people having health care, they don’t deserve it!” and so here we are.

15.) Did you ever hear the one about the priest, the imam and the rabbi who walked into a hotel? You might not get it, it’s sort of an inn joke.